We kept the Christmas spirit alive when we returned from New York City. Finley had her annual "Parent Watch Night" at dance, where we got to see all the progress she and her classmates had made over the year. It was so fun to watch her shine, and I loved meeting her dance friends. We also helped the girls pick out their outfits for the upcoming recital. Finley did an amazing job, and it’s always heartwarming to see her doing something she truly enjoys.
The next day, Finley’s class went on their long-awaited field trip to Arrowhead Stadium. They even got a behind-the-scenes tour and got to visit the Chiefs’ locker room, which was a huge thrill!
That weekend, we carried on our tradition of a Christmas lights tour, hitting up all our favorite spots. We also made a special visit to Autumn’s grave to see how her tree looked at night. It was peaceful and festive at Queen of Holy Rosary, where they light up the church, school, and surrounding buildings. Her tree looked right at home in that glowing, peaceful setting.
Later that week Lissy came into town to watch the kids while Caroline and Jared took a well-deserved trip to Park City, Utah. Her and I went to a Christmas party at the Knobloch's that they organized since we could not get into any of the Christmas Pop Up Bars. We had a great time with Aunt Lissy, and she brought along the infamous "Christmas Goat"—definitely one of the most annoying, yet oddly hilarious, gifts of the year!
That Friday, the kids had their last day of school before the Christmas break. I dropped Baylor off at school, and Briley took the younger two while I headed out of town for my Uncle Denny's funeral in Eldon, Missouri. Caroline, Emmie, and Sully came with me. Uncle Denny was my mom’s last surviving sibling, and his passing from lung cancer came so suddenly it left us all in shock. The service was beautiful, with a moving homily by Father Paul Clark and a heartfelt eulogy by his daughter, my cousin Tonya. Denny and Autumn shared so many qualities—both humble servants, with genuine hearts, a deep faith, a love for family, and an understated sense of humor. Denny was one of those people who always showed up, no matter the inconvenience. I’ll always remember the mechanical horse named Smokey he gave my mom for the grandkids. It’s in the garage, and whenever we’re all together, you can count on hearing Smokey going and the sound of children’s laughter. I thought of him each time it played over the Christmas break, and I find comfort knowing they are both in heaven now, celebrating Christmas in peace and joy.
Saturday was Nutcracker day! Autumn and the girls had a tradition of attending the Nutcracker together to kick off the Christmas break, and it was an important tradition for Briley and Finley. I made sure to keep it going, and this year, Finley’s friend Ella joined us. We had great seats and access to the VIP room where the girls enjoyed treats and photos with the performers. One of Autumn and Amity’s childhood friends, who danced with the Kansas City Ballet, surprised the girls with autographed shoes from the Sugar Plum Fairy herself! They were over the moon with excitement. Afterward, we headed to a holiday party at one of Finley’s friends’ houses for food, drinks, and a fun white elephant gift exchange.
In past years, we’ve always done Christmas at home on Christmas Eve morning, before heading to Kirksville in the afternoon. It made for a fun, but exhausting, day, especially with midnight mass later that evening. This year, I decided it might be better to get to Kirksville a day earlier to have more time with family and friends. It turned out to be a wonderful decision, and I think we’ll keep this new tradition. Our Christmas Eve at home this year was on Sunday. We spent the day listening to Christmas music, baking cookies, getting last-minute gifts, and just soaking in the holiday season. That evening, we had dinner at Rye on the Plaza, with Baylor’s girlfriend Dorothy joining us. It was a lovely meal, made even more memorable when a mystery patron covered our bill. We were all stunned and so incredibly grateful for this unexpected kindness—God bless you, whoever you are!
After dinner, we enjoyed the Plaza lights and then headed home for the kids’ sibling gift exchange, followed by the always-anticipated Christmas PJs. The kids got into their pajamas, made reindeer food, set out cookies and milk for Santa, and settled in for a reading of Twas the Night Before Christmas. Then it was off to bed, and I’m sure it was a sleepless night for them, filled with excitement. I spent the rest of the evening finishing up Christmas preparations, wrapping presents, and getting everything ready, finally wrapping up around 1:30 am. I cherished this quiet time, as it was always something Autumn and I treasured together, working side by side to create a magical Christmas morning. While she wasn’t with me physically this year, I know she was with me in spirit, and I like to think she would be proud of the Christmas morning we created.
As the kids get older, they wake up later and later. A few years ago, we set the wake-up time at no earlier than 6:30, and last year we moved it to 7. This year, I held the line at 7, and I was surprised when they didn’t wake up before then. At 7 on the dot, I came out to see all four kids lined up along the balcony railing, ready to go. They still had that same excited look in their eyes, and even though they’re older now, the wonder of Christmas morning is still very much alive. I turned on the lights and music, and gave them the green light to rip into their presents. The house was filled with laughter and joy.
Atticus’ favorite gifts were probably his new bike and a pair of Steph Curry shoes. Finley loved her new soccer goal and a locket engraved with a picture of her and Mom, with Autumn’s "💗 Mom" signature etched on the outside. Baylor was thrilled with his new Nike Dunk shoes and Beats earbuds. Briley adored her new Ninja Creami (she’s all about homemade ice cream) and a locket similar to Finley’s. The kids (Briley, especially) got me some much-needed new plates for the kitchen, along with tasty treats in my stocking. Finley also gave me a framed picture she made at school with her class photo. I also created shadow boxes for each of the kids to remember our last family trip to Maui with Autumn. I used black sand and seashells from the black sand beaches to line the bottom, and included our family photo, leis from the Old Lahaina Luau, and pictures of the kids surfing. It turned out beautifully and is something they can always treasure. I think we can all agree the kids favorite gift of the morning was a trip in June to Disney World to celebrate Briley finishing high school. I made calendars for all the kids like Autumn did, and on the days we are in Disney, I put pictures of each of them at Disney over the years. I thought for sure Briley would catch it, so as she was flipping to June in her calendar, I turned on the ceiling fan, where I had placed a bunch of Disney themed confetti. She was so confused when it started raining down, thinking she had some how done it. It was not until Baylor saw that it was Mikey Mouse confetti that they all began to put it together. Such a fun surprise.
After a Christmas breakfast of German pancakes, we packed up and headed to Kirksville. We arrived around 4 pm, made our rounds to Mike and Julie’s, and then headed over to the Bobzien’s for a delicious steak dinner, prepared by Jarred and Ryan. The house was incredibly festive, and after months of work, it was nearly complete. It was a great way to kick off the holiday festivities in Kirksville. By the time we returned to my parents’ house, I was ready to crash. I think everyone was—so we all slept in on Christmas Eve morning.
Waking up well-rested on Christmas Eve was a nice change! My siblings surprised the kids and I with tickets to a Savannah Banana's game in KC, the kids are so excited. They also gave me a funny Clark Griswold pull string doll. Finley told me I remind her a lot of Clark Griswold...something her mother always said as well. Later that afternoon, I went over to Mike’s to help set up his new TV, and spent some time with him and Karen. Briley went on her run and then visited Julie for the afternoon. That evening, we headed over to Autumn’s uncle Rick and Lisa’s house for their Christmas celebration. The kids played Left, Right, Center, while I indulged in desserts and soups. We did our gift exchange, and then a different Santa made an appearance. After some photos, we headed back to my parents’ house to prepare for Midnight Mass. Jeff and Julie joined us, so we all piled into the Suburban. As always, the service was beautiful, but by the time it ended at 1:30 am, I was more than ready for bed.
On Christmas morning, the kids were eager to burst through the doors at Grandma and Papa’s. They waited patiently as the Farwell and Bobzien families finished their Christmas celebrations before heading over. We had a lovely morning of gift-giving—new perfumes, luggage, footballs, soccer balls, books, and even a neon Chiefs sign. After a delicious breakfast of Christmas waffles, we made our way to Mike’s for lunch and his gift exchange. Mike went simple this year, giving the kids cash (always appreciated). We gave Seger a bubble mower and Amity a locket with Autumn’s "💗 Autumn" signature engraved on it, similar to the ones we gave Briley and Finley.
Later, we had Christmas dinner at my parents’ house. Mike and Karen joined us before dinner, and Jeff, Julie, Asa, Kelsey, and Seger came over for the meal. It was so wonderful to be surrounded by family this Christmas, especially with everything that’s happened this year. After dinner, Kenny and Dolly made another appearance, and brought along their friends the Oak Ridge Boys...a good laugh after a tough year. Next we did the cousin and sibling gift exchange. Molly gave Autumn a library box to place along our sidewalk at home, filled with children’s books for the neighborhood. It will have a placard that says, "In Loving Memory of Autumn, who always loved a good book." Amanda gave me gift cards and a beautiful yellow stained-glass cross to hang in the window as a reminder of Autumn’s faith and love of the color yellow. I’ve placed it next to her side of the bed, and every morning I see the sun shining through it when I open the curtains.
That evening, we headed over to Jeff and Julie's for their Christmas celebration. The kids excitedly set out their cookies for Santa, read Twas the Night Before Christmas, sprinkled out the reindeer food, and then eagerly went to bed. After a long, joyful Christmas day, everyone slept in, and we didn't get started until around 8:30. I received some new clothes and kitchen glassware, replacing the ones we’d bought a few years ago that ended up being more fragile than we’d hoped. The kids got new sneakers, soccer cleats, perfumes, soccer jerseys, and sweatshirts. Briley was especially excited to get her very first Department 56 Christmas Village house, starting a new tradition with her collection. It was another special Christmas morning filled with joy.
After breakfast, I headed to Jared’s office to help him, Ryan, Zane, and Brad tear down a few walls to open up the space. We ran into some electrical hiccups—wires the electrician had said were dead, but clearly weren’t. Despite that, we managed to get the job done, and the space looks so much more open and airy. The ladies in the office were even impressed with the work, especially since they had pretty low expectations going in! I had to leave a little early to head back to Jeff and Julie’s, where I started preparing the beef tenderloin for dinner. We enjoyed a fantastic meal, rounded off with some of Julie’s amazing homemade cheesecake. Afterward, Asa and Kelsey headed back to Columbia, and later in the evening, we went to the Cleavers’ house to give them a gift and let the kids hang out while we caught up. We don’t get to see them often, so it was great to spend some time together.
When we got back home, I noticed that the engine fan on the Suburban was still running after I’d turned off the car. It did the same thing the next morning, so I took it to the repair shop right away. Fortunately, they were able to figure out the issue and get it fixed, though it didn’t get done until after 4 pm. That meant we didn’t get back to KC as early as planned, but honestly, it could have been much worse. We were just grateful it happened while we were close enough to get it fixed without being stranded on the side of the road.
Although this Christmas was more emotional than most, with Autumn's physical absence felt deeply, it also served as a powerful reminder that even in our hardest times, we can still find peace and happiness in this magical season. It’s a beautiful testament to how God meets us in our darkest moments, lifting us up and filling our hearts with His grace and glory.
